Where is the frontier in independent school education today? 

Historically, independent schools have strived to use every tool available to help their students excel academically demonstrated in high-standardized test scores. These measures have supported students’ entrance into the very best schools in the world, but don’t necessarily express how well students will do in college after their first year. Nor do the scores indicate how well students will work in teams to solve complex problems, or challenges, show empathy, or navigate ambiguity as I have seen directing the Innovation and Entrepreneurship program at USM where students solve complex, real-world problems independently and on teams. When answers aren’t clear and students struggle to find them, their biological systems sometimes take over and they can lack the strategies to navigate their self and social awareness, as well as manage relationships. As more and more of these students participate in internships in the community to accompany academic programs and provide experiential learning opportunities, it is even more important that they develop self and social awareness, as well as relationship management skills to find greater success working with professional teams in areas they are passionate about to maximize these opportunities; ironically, these are the soft skills that can be especially hard to measure and increase even though tools to do both exist.

Emotional Quotient, or EQ, has certainly taken its place at the professional level with substantial research supporting that it can be drastically increased, unlike intelligence, or IQ, but hasn’t been more formally introduced through assessments with opportunities to develop the affective skills that comprise EQ with most Upper School students today.  Further, universities are now using research on EQ during the admission’s process to better identify which students will actually excel through college today and beyond. For example, some admissions’ officers at the University of Chicago, MIT, and Notre Dame have to provide examples demonstrating how students work through ambiguity and are comfortable navigating opposing views as part of the application process. With this kind of growing performance and college admissions information in mind, I decided to investigate EQ further and determine how independent schools, like University School of Milwaukee, can strengthen students’ emotional quotients helping them grow into the best versions of themselves to excel in life!

According to Bradberry and Greaves, “People with the highest levels of intelligence (IQ) outperform those with average IQs just 20% of the time, while people with average IQs outperform those with high IQs 70% of the time.” Countless studies indicate that the critical variable that explains success is emotional quotient, or EQ, and that can be increased and strengthened! Emotional quotient can be divided into four categories including self-awareness, self-management, and social awareness and relationship management. There are currently valid and reliable tools available to help our students measure and develop the affective skills they will need to accompany their intelligence and live happy and successful lives (Bradberry & Greaves, 2009, p. 8). If that is not convincing enough, Bradberry and Greaves tested over half a million people, and according to their research, EQ comprises 58 percent of performance across professions and is the largest predictor of success personally and professionally.  In fact, 90 percent of the highest performers also have high EQs making just under $30,000 MORE a year, while only 20 percent of low performers have high EQs. There is a $1300 increase in salary tied to each EQ point regardless of profession or region of the world people live in (2009).

With this information in hand, I took the first step and provided students the opportunity to survey, or assess, their EQs and identify where their strengths and challenges were in each of the four categories using Talentsmart’s survey. Their assessment contains at total of 66 strategies to strengthen EQ. According to students, the assessment was user-friendly and easy to understand from the very beginning of the process. Some students readily discussed the four categories and the one or two strategies they focused on to improve the way they managed their relationships at school and on the playing fields. They readily identified where they found challenges when trying to understand their friends’ feelings as they relate to social awareness and how the strategies in their profiles were helping them to connect with others in social situations more effectively. It was much easier to do deep project work with the students individually and on teams following the survey because the four categories could be referenced with students as needed in a constructive and non-threatening way.

In the first two categories, students develop internal lenses to better understand their self-awareness and self-management. When students become more self aware, they are able to know themselves as they really are. They better understand the emotions they are experiencing, where emotions come from, and why they are there. In fact, 83 percent of top performers are self-aware leading to much better self-regulation and management. There are 15 specific self-awareness strategies that can be measured and improved throughout students’ educational experience. According to students, the process itself also helped them become more mindful overall and less reactive when they felt uncomfortable emotions. As students’ self-management skills strengthened, they used their emotional awareness to determine how to behave. Since the brain experiences emotions in the limbic system before they get to the prefrontal cortex, it is vital to identify the specific emotion, and then respond most appropriately to a situation. There are 17 strategies to help students regulate their emotions in appropriate ways and the original survey helps pinpoint which ones to prioritize to strengthen their individual emotional quotients.

The other two categories, social awareness and relationship management, require students to use outward lenses to understand and respond to others. Social awareness is students’ ability to use their senses to identify others’ emotions and cues. The sixth sense, or emotions, can also be used in the process. There are 17 strategies that can help students overcome challenges that might be hindering their social awareness in the survey and each profile is provided the most effective strategies to strengthen their social awareness. Relationship management utilizes skills in the other three EQ categories to act or respond to others’ emotions and behaviors appropriately. There are 17 strategies to strengthen how students manage relationships for the long-term well after a honeymoon period has ended. These can be easy to reference when conflicts between students arise and provide vehicles to resolution suited to each student’s strengths and weaknesses.

TalentSmart’s program is just one valid and reliable program on the market today among other competitors like Six Seconds, which also provides strong materials to strengthen EQ as part of social emotional learning tailored more closely to the nonprofit sector. There is detailed content explaining each strategy to increase EQ once a profile has been created for students. Based on my experience using an EQ survey with students, I have seen firsthand that the profile materials containing the 65 specific strategies with students serve as a reliable guide to help them develop and strengthen their emotional quotients to lead healthier, happier, and more successful lives while attending independent schools, wherever they choose to go to college, and in any one of the professions they pursue. In conclusion, I’d like to extend this tool to the faculty as many tried it informally and found it extremely helpful themselves. There are new, reliable, and valid EQ tools with the potential to improve the lives of all people in the school community. Having experimented with one such tool this year, I’m optimistic and excited to continue working with my team to learn even more and expand the opportunity to continue the history of the independent school where the most effective tools available are utilized to help others find the greatest success in life.

Self Awareness Strategies

1. Quit treating your feelings as good or bad
2. Observe the ripple effect from your emotions.
3. Lean into your discomfort
4. Feel your emotions physically
5. Know who and what pushes your buttons
6. Watch yourself like a hawk
7. Keep a journal about your emotions
8. Don’t be fooled by a bad mood
9. Don’t be fooled by a good mood either
10. Stop and ask yourself why you do the things you do
11. Visit your values
12. Check yourself
13. Spot your emotions in books, movies, and music
14. Seek feedback
15. Get to know yourself under stress.

Self Management Strategies

1. Breathe right
2. Create an emotion vs reason list
3. Make your goals public
4. Count to ten
5. Sleep on it
6. Talk to a skilled self-manager
7. Smile and laugh more
8. Set aside some time in your day for problem solving
9. Take control of your self-talk
10. Visualize yourself succeeding
11. Clean up your sleep hygeine
12. Focus your attention on your freedoms, rather than your limitations
13. Stay synchronized
14. Speak to someone who is not emotionally invested in your problem
15. Learn a valuable lesson from everyone you encounter
16. Put a mental recharge into your schedule
17. Accept that change is just around the corner

Social Awareness Strategies

1. Greet people by name
2. Watch body language
3. Make timing everything Develop a back-pocket question
4. Don’t take notes at meetings
5. Plan ahead for social gatherings
6. Clear away the clutter
7. Live in the moment
8. Go on a 15-minute tour
9. Watch EQ at the movies
10. Practice the art of listening
11. Go people watching
12. Understand the rules of the culture game
13. Test for accuracy
14. Step into their shoes
15. Seek the whole picture
16. Catch the Mood of the room

Relationship Strategies

1. Be open and be curious
2. Enhance your natural communication style
3. Avoid giving mixed signals
4. Remember the little things that pack a punch
5. Take feedback well
6. Build trust
7. Have an “open door” policy
8. Only get mad on purpose
9. Don’t avoid the inevitable
10. Acknowledge the other person’s feelings
11. Complement the person’s emotions or situation
12. When you care, show it
13. Explain your decisions, don’t just make them
14. Make your feedback direct and constructive
15. Align your intention with your impact
16. Offer a “fix-it” statement during a broken conversation
17. Tackle a tough conversation

References
Bradberry, T., Greaves, J. (2009). Emotional Intelligence 2.0. San Diego, CA: TalentSmart.